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Curtis Cosby
Video For Critique
on Jul 27, 2015 at 7:43:47 pm

Hey Everyone, Not sure where would have been the best place to post this so if I need to move it to another forum just let me know. Could I get some constructive criticism on this video I made for a jewelry designer. If you have any questions about it let me know as I would be happy to answer them.







Thanks
Curtis

Curtis Cosby
Multimedia Assistant


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Blaise Douros
Re: Video For Critique
on Jul 27, 2015 at 11:05:13 pm

I'm gonna be brutal, so don't take it too personally!

There is no overarching story to this piece. You could cut this down to the story about the pearls and iron, and that would be a nice piece all on its own, but the rest just seems like rambling.

The talking-head interview is lit really hot--try dropping this footage down by a half-stop or more. It seems a little too yellow for my taste. You could fix that by grading the white balance a bit cooler.

You need a LOT more b-roll for this. You've got some visible jump cuts, and TBH, she's not a very charismatic interview subject. So you need to cover all of that up by shooting beauty shots of the finished jewelry pieces, closeups of her hands sketching, more stuff of her in the workshop...anything but watching her staring off disinterestedly in different directions in the room while she thinks about what she's going to say next.

Speaking of that, cut out all the long pauses, ums and uhhhs, lip smacking...it's your job to make her look articulate and interesting, and you can do that by improving the cadence of her speech. That's why you need more b-roll.

Try starting the section on the iron piece with the clip of her talking about contrast. Then let her tell the story of how she used that principle to design the piece.

Cut out the whole last section where she is talking about what she doesn't do. Nobody cares about what she doesn't do, and it makes her sound really negative, especially when that's the last thing we hear her say.

Finally, add a little bit of motion to the still images, and use cuts instead of fades to get away from them.

My two cents.


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Curtis Cosby
Re: Video For Critique
on Jul 29, 2015 at 12:46:56 pm

Hey, Thanks for the "harsh" criticism. That is why I posted it, I feel one of the ways we get better is to hear what others with experience see is "wrong" with it and try to incorporate that going forward.

I am not sure if I will get a chance to recut this anytime soon but I am going to try and do that with some of your suggestions. I do have some b-roll I'm not sure if it will be enough to do the edit your mentioning above but I may give it a try.

Thanks again
Curtis

Curtis Cosby
Multimedia Assistant


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Laurence Bartone
Re: Video For Critique
on Aug 12, 2015 at 1:42:57 am

Excellent - my thoughts (almost) exactly. I'd love to see a bit of classic Charleston.

bartone.com


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Aaron Star
Re: Video For Critique
on Jul 28, 2015 at 11:15:13 pm

I think think your skintones and highlights are to high, and work on CC the greenish lighting balance on her face.



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Curtis Cosby
Re: Video For Critique
on Jul 29, 2015 at 12:49:18 pm

I'll definitely look into to some more color correction. I feel like the footage always falls apart on me. Your example looks pretty good so maybe I am doing something wrong. I'll look more into that and see what I can come up with.

Thanks
Curtis

Curtis Cosby
Multimedia Assistant


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Blaise Douros
Re: Video For Critique
on Jul 29, 2015 at 9:06:43 pm

h.264 footage (which is what I assume this is) will fall apart with heavy correction, but it should be able to hold up with subtle adjustments. Aaron's example is pretty much what I had in mind.

Even if you don't recut this for the client, it might be worth it for you to create a new cut just so you can practice refining the story. Going back and improving your own work with new knowledge can be hugely helpful.

Good luck!


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