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Fliques Osman
The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 5:40:16 am

Jason Bailey has written an interesting post about the 30 Harshest Filmmaker on Filmmaker Insults. A good (tabloid guilty pleasure) read for filmmakers.

http://www.fliquesosman.com/?p=819

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Mike Cohen
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 12:57:55 pm

Funny - true in some cases. Supposedly directors all know each other. If they have not actually met, this assumes they have seen one another's work. Has Tim Burton sat down and watched Clerks? Doubtful. Has Kevin Smith watched Batman? He was first in line the Summer of 1989 to see it like the rest of us. Has Smith watched Burton's Planet of the Apes? Probably not - nobody watched it.

Mike Cohen


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Tim Wilson
Burton/Smith/Apes, Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History:
on Aug 11, 2011 at 2:54:52 pm

[Mike Cohen] "Has Smith watched Burton's Planet of the Apes? Probably not - nobody watched it."

Smith absolutely DID see Planet of the Apes, and his comments about it turned into a "possible lawsuit" with Tim Burton over stealing the ending of the movie from one of Kevin's Silent Bob and Jay comics. THAT's where Burton's comments about never reading anything by Kevin came from.

It turns out that Kevin was making an entirely accurate observation that the New York Post blew out of proportion. Who could imagine that?

"When I saw the movie, I thought it was ironic that we both used that same image - nothing more," said Smith. "I made some comments about it to the New York Post. Here we are."

Smith did say that the article gave him something useful for his next comic book project. "I enjoyed Tim's quote in the Post. I'll use that on a trade paperback one day," he said."

More here.

The irony is that he was stepping back from what the Post reported:

"My jaw hit the ground when I saw that scene," Smith told Post movie critic Lou Lumenick. "I think I got robbed and I'm talking with my lawyers about possibly suing."


I like that Kevin turned down the heat on his first reaction. That's very much in keeping with my general view of Kevin as both highly emotional, and very reasonable: he has a first gut reaction, and takes the opportunity to think more about it later. Good for him. We should all be so careful about the things we say, even if we're thoughtful AFTER we say them.

And as far as I can find in a speedy search, Kevin didn't actually say he was as disappointed by it as I was. But he definitely saw it.

As for who else saw the movie, LOTS of people watched it. It opened to $68 million in 2001, around $80 million today. It was the number 2 movie of the year behind the first Harry Potter picture, which, until this summer, was the highest-attended of the lot by a good distance.

Total gross was $180 million US, plus another $180 million domestic - more specifically a total of $362 million. At today's ticket prices and a little inflation, closing in on $500 million. But even assuming exact equivalence of dollar value, this is in the neighborhood of, say, JJ Abrams' Star Trek, at $365 million 2009 dollars, the highest-grossing Trek of all time.

The budget for Apes was a relatively modest $100 million, so a 3.6x return on investment. I'd do that all day, every day - wouldn't you? I don't know that I've ever had a 360% return on ANYTHING.

There's simply no standard by which the 2001 release wasn't a big hit. The only people who didn't like it were many of the ones who went to see it....but see it they did.

I don't know if Burton had seen ANY movies by Kevin Smith, but it's enough to have an opinion about a director without seeing any of their pictures...or a show without watching, or a restaurant without going. "I'd NEVER go there," right? That's how it works. But as much as Tim says he didn't read comics, it stretches credulity to think that he hadn't a least seen Frank Miller's "Dark Knight: Year One" two years earlier. "Hrumph hrumph - that's a graphic novel, not a comic book."

So, as usual, my humble observation is that the numbers are the numbers, and movie nerds like me remember more than is healthy.

PS. Anybody going to take the over/under on whether this year's Apes does $68 million in its opening weekend? Bet the under: Fox is whispering $45 million. I think they might be pushing it a little low so that they can say it beat expectations...

...but maybe not. Thor opened at $65. Does this feel that big to you? So I'm sticking with my bet on the under.


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Scott Roberts
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 3:16:55 pm

[Tim Wilson] "
PS. Anybody going to take the over/under on whether this year's Apes does $80 million in its opening weekend? Bet the under: Fox is whispering $45 million."


It made $54 million last weekend.


Tim Burton is the biggest tease in modern cinema history. All his movies make a ton of money on the promise that you're about to see a unique Tim Burton take on the material. Fans of his early work and current fans of Hot Topic continue to flow into his movies based on a hope of something good. Everyone goes to see them despite them all being relatively awful. Planet of the Apes, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Alice in Wonderland... All crap (in my opinion), and it's horrible that he keeps making billion dollar bad movies, based on super relatable well-known properties, because it only means he'll keep making more. I know his newer movies make a lot of people happy, but I'm not one of them. His gothy "curvy tree" schtick is played out, and boring. Big Fish is the only good movie he's made in the latter half of his career, and it's really good. And it's the least Tim Burtony feeling Tim Burton movie ever made.

From the article:

23. Vincent Gallo on Martin Scorsese:
“I wouldn’t work for Martin Scorsese for $10 million. He hasn’t made a good film in 25 years. I would never work with an egomaniac has-been.”

24. Vincent Gallo on Sofia (and Francis Ford) Coppola:
“Sofia Coppola likes any guy who has what she wants. If she wants to be a photographer she’ll f*** a photographer. If she wants to be a filmmaker, she’ll f*** a filmmaker. She’s a parasite just like her fat, pig father was.”



Wow, what a hypocrite. I wonder when these quotes are from? Because for one thing, he worked with Coppola on Tetro a few years ago, and Coppola is more of an egomaniac than Scorsese is. Then he insulted Coppola (and his daughter), either before he eventually worked with him, like a hypocrite, or after he worked with him, like a jerk. It's funny Vincent Gallo called someone an egomaniac has-been, because he's an egomaniac nobody.

*I don't like Vincent Gallo or his movies, fyi.


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Mark Suszko
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 3:58:28 pm

We'll be sure to check the AFI 100 for "The Brown Bunny".


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Mark Suszko
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 4:04:55 pm

Best pair of qoutes from that list




18. Tim Burton on Kevin Smith (after Smith jokingly accused Burton of stealing the ending of Planet of the Apes from a Smith comic book):
“Anyone who knows me knows I would never read a comic book. And I would especially never read anything created by Kevin Smith.”

19. Kevin Smith on Tim Burton (in response to “I would never read a comic book”):
“Which, to me, explains (Burton's) ***king Batman.”


So much THIS.
Rock on Kevin, and please hire me some day.


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Jeff Breuer
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 4:10:21 pm

[Scott Roberts] "
Wow, what a hypocrite."


I thought the same for the last quote.

Uwe Boll on Michael Bay:
�I�m not a f*****g retard like Michael Bay.�

Uwe Boll...now there is a guy you would think would need to be more focused on making friends than enemies. He's a man on an island with few, if any, bridges left.

Jeff


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Jeff Breuer
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 4:11:34 pm

[Scott Roberts] "
Wow, what a hypocrite."


I thought the same for the last quote.

Uwe Boll on Michael Bay:
“I’m not a f-----g retard like Michael Bay.”

Uwe Boll...now there is a guy you would think would need to be more focused on making friends than enemies. He's a man on an island with few, if any, bridges left.

Jeff


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Tim Wilson
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 11, 2011 at 5:11:28 pm

[Scott Roberts] "[Tim Wilson] "
PS. Anybody going to take the over/under on whether this year's Apes does $80 million in its opening weekend? Bet the under: Fox is whispering $45 million."

It made $54 million last weekend."


Jeez louise, I totally slept through that!!! I confess to being in the home stretch of the next issue of the magazine, but I could have sworn it opened tomorrow! I must have been thinking of Glee 3D.

But I was right about betting the under!

Speaking of under, I was WAY under my guess for the inflation-adjusted gross. In today's dollars, Burton's Apes opened at $96.5 million! So the new one is around 55% of the original, but also on a lower production budget ($93 million, minus inflation).

I'd have checked that the first time if I'd remembered that it opened already! D'oh!

Next question: anybody want to take the over/under on Apes vs. Glee? Kidding - Glee is aiming for niche numbers. Maybe 15% of Apes money. OTOH, Final Destination 5 is looking like a $50+ million opening....

re: Gallo, I'm not shocked by his quote. I'm shocked that anybody asked him the question.


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Alvin Manalo
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 12, 2011 at 7:05:53 pm

Gosh, I was shocked by the comments, I mean most of those directors that received harsh words from their fellow directors where either Academy Award Nominees or Winners. I wonder if these harsh comments are pure envy or what.

mabuhay


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Tim Wilson
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 12, 2011 at 7:32:43 pm

You think these are bad? Check out the 30 Harshest Author-on-Author Insults. These authors are not only competing against each other - each of the authors is competing with the entire history of author insults. The insults are an integral part of their literary legacy.

The list itself is awesome, but be sure to read the comments, where many additional insults were documented by readers.


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Alvin Manalo
Re: The 30 Harshest Filmmaker-on-Filmmaker Insults in History
on Aug 12, 2011 at 9:19:58 pm

Haha, I was amused of the poetic-scowls!

mabuhay


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